In the end, it doesn’t even matter. All the fear, the arguments, the being right. Dr. Wayne Dyer always said, I’d rather be happy than right. I would agree with him. When you have left this earth, what matters is how you lived your life and the connections that you made. People will remember how you made them feel and the words that you said. Are you choosing to lead with ego and fear, or authenticity and love?
I’m sure we have all witnessed relationship stress. Not only does it affect those directly involved, but it also affects their loved ones. Many times, it’s miscommunication and the need to defend our views and to be right. To me, it’s a waste of time and energy to worry about others’ opinions and what they are thinking. I’m not saying that I don’t worry about these at times, but I do have the awareness to know that it’s not in my best interest when I do. We can’t control others thoughts and feelings, but we can control OUR own reactions. It is good to see different perspectives, but when you connect with your intuition, you are the only one who can decide the best path for yourself.
I’ve been in a unique position of losing 3 of my loved ones in a short period of time, with little or no warning. As the pandemic hit, I witnessed uncertainty, fear and unknown. And through it all, I knew that it could be so much worse. I know this pandemic has hit many people very hard, but in comparison to losing my family members, it’s just different. What matters is those friends and family who have supported and reached out to me. What matters is how I feel in the current moment, and giving myself the grace to treat myself as my best friend treats me.
So, I invite you to take a look at where your mental energy is going. Are you reliving negative conversations in your mind, or expecting the worse? Are you thinking about your next step to prove that you are right? Or, are you treating yourself and others kindly and understanding that we are all growing and learning in this new landscape? That we all are doing the best that we can with the life experiences that we have been given?
Thank you for reading, and I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Isn’t it wonderful to know that you can leave someone feeling more uplifted and loved with your words? Our words live on. Good and bad. All that we write to others is documented (especially now), a reminder of a different space and time. They may even become someone’s inner conversations. What are you saying with your words?
I am lucky enough to have received an email in November 2018 from my Dad. One that he sent to my sisters and me, recapping his memories with us. Even though there were bad times that he acknowledged, he remembered the good in his life. He thanked us for being a part of his life, and let us know that he had a wonderful life with us in it. My mom and him didn’t receive a lot of “I love you’s” growing up, but in his email, he made sure that we knew that we were loved.
I just printed out the email, and know that this will be something that is so important to be passed along in our family, to his grandchildren and great-grandchildren. My Dad didn’t have to take the time to reflect on this life and express it to us, but I am so glad that he did. Many people will leave this world with words left unsaid, but each of us has the opportunity now to connect with those in our life and express our feelings. It’s easy to leave a few comments on social media, but really connecting with others takes more time and energy.
I was lucky enough to write my Dad a letter a few months before he passed away to express my love and gratitude. I had no clue what the next few months would bring when I wrote it. It was something that took a bit of effort, but I felt like it was important to write. And now that he’s in heaven, I am so grateful that he read those words that he told me meant the world to him. Had he or I have not written those words, we would have still known, but it’s nice to know for sure and have his email to reflect back on when I need a reminder.
Our words live on. They are precious, and life is precious. Your words can have a positive or negative impact. We can all use this reminder. Is there someone that you’d like to tell how much you love and appreciate them? Why not take a moment to write that letter or send that email? It could make a world of difference in their life, and for generations to come.